I'm linking up with Blog Hoppin' to share some tips about how I survive my life as a teacher.
I really only have one tip:
YOU'VE GOT TO HAVE A SENSE OF HUMOR
Sometimes days are so "bad" that you have to laugh just to keep from crying.
We've all had those days. (admit it)
When it seems like one thing after another just keeps happening.
Like we can't catch a break.
It was a day like this not too long ago that I sat down and wrote this story.
Please take the time to read it.
I really think many teachers will be able to relate.
If You Give a Teacher an Apple…
Written by: K. Coker
If you give a
teacher an apple,
She’ll want to
write you a thank you note for it.
As she walks to
her desk to find a pen,
She sees a
stack of papers she keeps meaning to file
So she sets the
apple on her desk and picks up the stack of papers.
She starts to
open the filing cabinet,
But she notices
a pile of dirt on the floor
So she goes to
find a broom to sweep it up.
On her way to
get the broom,
She knocks over
a chair that wasn’t stacked properly and it lands on her foot
So she hops
around waiting for the pain to subside.
Once her foot
feels better, she puts the chair back onto the desk
But then she
notices three other chairs that were not put away
So she puts
them up too.
The teacher
heads toward the broom again,
But the morning
bell rings and her students start to arrive
So she stops to
greet them at the door.
The students
enter the classroom in a good mood,
But they are
talking loudly to their friends
So the teacher
rings the bell and points to the CHAMPS chart on the wall.
And the
students settle down to eat a nice breakfast of graham crackers, apples and
milk.
While carrying
their mess to the trash can, lots of milk is spilled
The teacher
needs to find a rag to clean it up, but she has no clean rags.
So she grabs
some napkins instead.
The teacher
returns to the mess, but she sees that the crackers have been dropped onto the
floor
And stepped on
100 times
So the teacher
demands that all of the students help clean up.
Next the
teacher takes attendance and tries to start the lesson
But the
announcements come on while she is speaking
So she stops
and says the pledge of allegiance with the students (and is grateful for at
least one moment of silence).
After the
morning announcements are over, the teacher begins the lesson…
Again.
But when she
asks the students to get out their homework, seven of them have an excuse for
why they don’t have it done.
So she marks
them down for detention and hopes they will finish their work then.
During
detention, those same students show up without their papers or pencils.
But the teacher
wasn’t born yesterday
And she quickly
provides them with a new copy and sends them to work.
The teacher
walks her class to the cafeteria for lunch
But when they
get there, one of her students remembers they left their lunch in the classroom
So the teacher
has to walk back with them to unlock the door
The teacher
takes her class to PE, grateful for a break,
But then she
realizes she is supposed to be in a meeting
So she hurries
toward the conference room without stopping to use the bathroom.
She gets to the
meeting on time
But the five
minute meeting ends up taking her entire planning time
So the teacher
has to speed walk to get to the gym to pick up her students.
On the way back
to class, one of the boys tells her he doesn’t feel well
But while she
is writing him a pass to the nurse, he throws up all over his desk
So the teacher
has to call the janitor.
The janitor
cleans up the mess
But now the
students are rowdy and distracted
So the teacher
makes them “practice” being quiet for five minutes.
She is able to
teach the next lesson,
But when she
checks for understanding the students only give her blank stares
So she makes a
note to reteach the same concept the next day.
At the end of
the day, the students start to pack to go home
But they have
already forgotten how to be quiet
So the teacher
has to yell to get their attention
The students
finally get lined up in order to walk to the buses
But it starts
to thunderstorm
So the
principal announces that they will need to do a rain route dismissal
The teacher
plays a game with her students to keep them busy while they wait for their bus
to be called
But another
announcement informs them that there are three late buses
So the teacher
calls her husband to tell him she will be later than she planned.
As she is
hanging up the phone, she hears two students yelling at each other in the back
of the room
So she rushes
to referee.
As she runs,
she sees that someone has written with marker all over the counter top.
Once the fight
is stopped, the teacher searches for supplies to remove the marker
While looking
for another cleaning rag, the phone rings.
It’s a parent
of one of her students who wants to know why her child is getting a bad grade
in science.
So the teacher
patiently explains that the students hasn’t turned in any work for the entire
quarter.
The parent is
upset and wants the grade changed
But the teacher
offers to give the student an opportunity to earn some extra credit
So she has to
add one more thing to her mental to-do list.
When the last
three buses arrive, the teacher starts to pack her bag
But she
realizes that she hasn’t eaten anything all day
So she reaches
to grab the apple off her desk.
And when she picks it up,
She remembers
she still needs to write a thank you note
And for that
she will need to find a pen…
I have an entire Pinterest board dedicated to "funny school memes" because some nights I need to read through them and remember not to take all of it too seriously. Feel free to check it out.
Follow iTeachSTEM's board School Memes on Pinterest.
Follow iTeachSTEM's board School Memes on Pinterest.
One last thing.
I ALWAYS keep an emergency stash of chocolate...
And antacids...
(Notice the bottle is almost empty?)
Because some days chocolate will fix things, and some days it takes something stronger.
Good luck this year, my dear teacher friends!
Oh goodness, that is too close to the truth! LOL
ReplyDeleteScary, isn't it?!?
DeleteWhat a funny little story...and so true! A sense of humor is key!
ReplyDeleteThanks for sharing!
Danielle
The Crescent City Classroom
I'm glad you enjoyed the story. It truly didn't get me through a very rough day.
ReplyDelete